A Peek Inside the Home of a Narcissist:

RB
5 min readApr 14, 2019

Four Techniques a Narcissist Uses

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She was just a teenager when she met him. He was damaged goods. But he was beautiful… on the outside, any young girl would have thought the same. He had already learned the art of manipulation. He was no longer tender. Definitely way past that one. It started out bad and stayed bad. Rotten does not become fresh. She was too young to know such things. The stars in her eyes were far too bright.

How does a man-child become rotten at such a young age? Is it genetics, temperament, environment? His cake had been baked with all the ingredients to make a perfect narcissist. Oh, is that a bad word? Believe it, one of the worst! Living in a home with a doting and pampering grandmother and mother; coupled with an emotionally unavailable grandfather. The icing on the cake, an alcoholic father who abused the family before he was at the age of ten and then deserted. The boy had no discipline. He ruled the household. Recipe? That one had a double cup full of environment.

Girl meets boy. Boy manipulates girl. Girl eventually marries boy. It’s an old story. For whatever reason, she was what he wanted. And thus, it began. If a narcissist wants someone, they will use any form of manipulation to get and then and means to keep that person in their control until they no longer want them.

#1 Control

Young and naïve but willful she obviously had a mind of her own but with harsh control her thinking patterns changed. She came to the point where she could no longer make sense of the life she was living. It became a maze. Her life dragged on, year after torturous year.

#1 Fear

She schemed for years about how she and her children could get away but saw no clear path. From day one he had started to instill in her fear of what he would do to her and then the children. She saw no way out; her thoughts became tangled.

#3 Isolation

She was isolated from family and friends. Embarrassed and afraid, she kept the secrets. There was no help. This was his greatest weapon. They appeared to be the perfect family. He was known to be a wonderful person outside the four walls of his home. Inside everyone lived in dread of what would happen next. They walked on…

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RB

RB is a retired psychotherapist, storyteller, genealogists and lover of family.